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A waste of a brain?

have you ever felt so full of pain? i have. my pain has changed me. i no longer anazlyze anything. i no longer feel the need to pursue anything. i have become a much more calm, down to earth person - but have i lost all my potential? i no longer feel the need to voice my opinion, or even show the slightest sense of insight. when you give me a problem, i will give you an answer. pain blocks me off. all the pain i have endured so far in my life, has already caused me to lose touch with my intellectual being. there are too many deep thoughts, dark memories, and tragic flaws so far within me, that cause me to be afraid of myself.